Open Hatch

Archive for the ‘Video Games’ Category

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One day a few years ago, my brother and I burst into invented overlay melodies for this Nintendo music, as we drove in my car – I think this was on or near Halloween (2003?). But to me, this music is just downright.. I dunno. Christmasy.

[note: In time I'll update this to play it in the page with a little music player (flash), but it's at a mHz that makes it freak out right now]

- download .mp3 -
- download .m4a (.iTunes) -

[This was moved over here from my wiki - date unknown]

The Adventure Game! .. An old one. ..King’s Quest.. um.. I don’t remember which one.. at some point I was playing through this game with my wife, and laughing at some of the very funny (unintentionally so?) sound bytes. Here are captures I made of those sounds.

Leave my harp alone! ..

Ah, life giving water, nectar of the Gods! ..

Yonder lies the crystal cave! ..

Ech, a dead fish! Hmm..

[This was pulled from my wiki which I am overhauling - I don't know the original date of this.]

The music happens when

I am ready for the next level,
A task has been accomplished,
Something evil and spooky might be going on, but I’m pretty okay with it,
I conquer evil,
It’s awesome,
I die, and when
It’s really, really over.

[Are you a nintendo junkie? Did you guess the game these are from? Castlevania 3. This is another pull from my aging wiki, originally posted April 28th 2005]

I bought the game CIVILIZATION IV. I played it some, and have mostly shelved it. WAY TOO EPIC.

As your civilization discovers and develops technologies and so forth, the voice of Leonard Nimoy informs you: “You have discovered <thus-and-such>”. When I play the game with new victims, I send a message to everyone in the game chat:

You have discovered pants.

This gets a good laugh.

This game expansion I wrote character dialogue for was released yesterday. It’s for the game in the subject header, on the XBOX 360 Live Arcade.

The company forum had some positive player feedback here.

Earlier positive reviews for the game were noted here.

All that running and resolve, and Mrs. Pac Man hasn’t lost anything. Doesn’t she get that she’s taking in as many calories as she burns?

She should just face it, her basic shape is round. In older times, this shape was more ideal because it signified farming power and the luxuries of living carnivorously. It’s too bad they stopped making farms to remind us that fat is power. And poor Mrs. Pac Man isn’t adored like the farm girl she should be. She was born in the wrong time.

At least we still have those holdovers of farming and fat power: Thanksgiving, and McDonald’s. Was Mrs. Pac Man ever in a happy meal? With a little straw hat? I bet they didn’t add a straw hat. They should.

No, Mr. and Mrs. Pac Man are silicon children. The best they can hope for is liposuction and plastic and silicone reshaping.

And isn’t it time for Mrs. Pac Man to have some equality? Shouldn’t she resent having Man in her name? Shouldn’t she be Mrs. Pac Myn? And isn’t it unfair that HE is in more games? Why does she keep hanging around that loser?

[This post updated]

Outpost Kaloki X, which I helped make, was reviewed by teamxbox.com with a a higher rating than any Live Arcade game available at Xbox 360 release.

They say:

“…there’s some very funny text…the Sarge’s garblespeak is damn funny”, “…a great family game”, “…Fans of tycoon-style gaming will finally feel like they have a place in the console world too.”

ign.com has rated it the number 2 game to download on the platform.

“..a pleasant surprise”, “..a totally different experience”, “..load this title up and you’ll be hooked”, and “This is one of the most unique experiences on the XBLA.”

I’ve created levels for a video game. It’s a cartoony space station simulation, on the Xbox 360. Here’s a list of reviews. My levels are a love story. The goal is to date any or all of four girls and marry one. These are excerpts of dialogue I wrote for the levels. Player responses are in brackets.

Ann, the Librarian
Would you like to hear part of a poem I started?
[Yes]
Brutish swagger, mop my heart,
Flooding sorrows ‘ere thou part . .

Great Museum! Look at those kids just sucking in the knowledge! I wish I sucked as much as they do!
[You do!]
Really? Oh, I’m so flattered!

Are you enjoying our romance?
[Yes]
Does it sometimes seem like there is only one possible response to anything I say?
[Yes] [No]
What about now?
[Yes]

Poppy, the Hippie
I realized I was a robot when my third boyfriend contracted tetanus. My parents tried to blame my braces, but I knew better.
[Okay]

Will you build me a Comedy Club? It would be only for me. But it would reach out to everyone. Except for the people I make fun of.
[Okay]

Want to hear a joke?
[Yes] [No]
Okay. How many robots does it take to change a light bulb?
[ 3? ] [I don't know]
None! The enslaved humans do it for them! A ha ha HA HA HA WRAAAA HAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
[Heh. . .]

Figures. They didn’t program you right.
[Okay]

Blenda, the Cheerleader
So that you know, my favorite drink is deep fried oil.
[Okay. . .]

Did you know Poppy said I was a bad, bad human in her.. journal? .. Isn’t Poppy awful?
[No]
But I thought you hated everyone I do! I hate you! No, I don’t, because then if you hated everyone I do, you would hate yourself! I’m so confused. . .
[All Right]

Wanna be my boyfriend? I’m not jealous or judgemental like those other terrible girls.
[Yep] [Sorry, no]

Wraeth, the Goth Chick
It’s very nice that you liked Ann’s poem, but I had a thought. If her heart flooded, wouldn’t it be a river of blood?
[I guess so]

Here’s a poem you inspired:
Black Hole spins, devouring all
Matter binding to the fall
Inward screaming, mute I call
None can hear the crushing pall.
[Thanks?]

Want to go on a pretend date?
[Sure]
Wahoo! That was fun.
[It was?]

I asked a question at a forum (Utah Game Developers yahoo group) about what people are playing lately. Here I answer my own question, after a sad explanation of everything I don’t play.

The last game I greatly indulged was Animal Crossing (hard to describe), which simulates time passages between game sessions. I passed the interval threshold of game-gluttony happiness, and the attention-starved neighbors and weeds overran: this only reinforced my wish to abandon them. I also got bored with materialism.

Other games I abandoned that all share the same cardinal sin of games; spawning you way too far back from where you progressed before death: Zelda Windwaker, Zelda 64, Homeworld, Half-Life. Far overdue investigations: Final Fantasy VII, Metal Gear Solid, Neverwinter Nights.

I played and don’t like WarCraft III. You spawn impossibly micro-unmanageable armies of fantastic creatures to execute genocide. BIG. WHOOP.

But what I do play is Wario Ware occasionally (Frenetic weirdness and I think a riot), Super Smash Bros (a cartoon brawl), Super Monkey Ball (strange sporting), I’ve dipped back into trying to finish Metroid Prime (exploring a strange planet and destroying mutants), and the game I worked on.

My wife plays games more than me – or that is played before our first baby was born and lately she played Harvest Moon, which is so cool because it supercedes materialism. I’ve played it a little when I have time.

I’ve played board games more frequently lately, with family: Settlers of Catan, San Juan, some bidding/buying game I forget the titled of (and always get wolloped at), Ticket to Ride, Trias, Starship Catan. Own the world, build the most, build and own the best, own the train stations, outrun your contemporaries, ditto. Somehow these games are fun despite the themes.

And yet the answer to Darwinian/competition games is not induced sharing (emotional Socialism?) The place to get didactic is Family Home Evening (or how about just unconditionally praising instead of preaching?), but spare us of too much and get on with the games. Don’t mix the two. That’s weird.